Celestial Marriage – Introduction


A while ago I decided to write a pro-Plural Marriage book. I took a different approach and wrote it in the form of a Church manual. The title is Celestial Marriage: Preserving Marriage and Strengthening Families. My hope was that the title would make the book more appealing to L-DS audiences. And being written in a manual format might make it easier to read for L-DS people. Nevertheless I never got around to publishing it. I’ll post these in honor of Plural Marriage Month which was actually last month.

Introduction

The World is Attacking Marriage

“In the world today, many people dismiss and even mock marriage and the family. Amid such confusing and destructive voices, the First Presidency and Quorum of the Twelve Apostles provide the consistent voice of truth. They ‘solemnly proclaim that marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God and that the family is central to the Creator’s plan for the eternal destiny of His children’ (see ‘The Family: A Proclamation to the World,’).

“Life’s greatest joys are found in the family. Strong family relationships require effort, but such effort brings great happiness in this life and throughout eternity. Even if you have not had a happy family life in the past, you can seek to have a happy, eternal marriage and a loving relationship with family members.” (True to the Faith)

Latter-day Saints Should Defend Marriage

As we progress closer to the second coming of our Savior; the adversary is increasing his fight against Celestial Marriage and the family. It the duty of all Latter-day Saints to learn of the essential principles surrounding Celestial Marriage. It is also their duty to defend these principles and give vocal objection to all who oppose God’s ordained pattern of marriage.

This book has been produced so that members of the Lord’s Church around the world may know what to do to stand strong against Satan’s influences. All Latter-day Saints are invited to read, study this book, and apply its contents.

Those who apply Heavenly Father’s laws in their lives will be blessed.

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23 Responses to Celestial Marriage – Introduction

  1. AV says:

    God instituted marriage in order to protect women & children especially, by binding men down to a life long commitment & covenant to love, serve & provide for his wife & children his whole life with complete fidelity. God did this because he knew it is the disposition of most men to a some point desire to be with another woman other than his wife. This is true for some women also, who also would want to be with another man.

    So God instituted marriage to protect women & children & at times men, from the abandonment or adultery of their spouse. God instituted governments & churches to make sure that men (or women) are not allowed to break & get out of their commitments & covenants & go be with anyone else than their one spouse, unless it’s for Christ’s rare exception of ‘fornication’ committed before the marriage was made but kept hidden.

    The problem today & for most of history is that most civil & religious ‘leaders’ have not done their most important divine responsibility in keeping men & women bound to their marriage commitments. But they instead weaken & allow divorce & thus divorce is now becoming more & more rampant until it will one day be rare for a marriage to stay intact for a whole life.

    All leaders who allow & go along with divorce will one day stand accountable before God for supporting the adultery, abuse & abandonment cased by those divorces & the suffering of the innocent spouses & children.

    Leaders are also obligated to protect spouses & children from any & all forms of abuse & adultery that would lead to such divorces & abandonment. Which is also not usually happening.

    And since ‘marriage’ is & has always been the preserver of the human race, divorce always quickly destroys individuals, churches & societies & thus it is impossible to disregard marriage covenants & maintain any society for long.

  2. Rob says:

    I think you have a few of these mixed up AV. I can see where you are coming from on them. There are some that could be switched around…

    “All leaders who allow & go along with divorce will one day stand accountable before God for supporting the adultery, abuse & abandonment cased by those divorces & the suffering of the innocent spouses & children.”

    ->All leaders who support a marriage that is full of abuse and suffering of innocent spouses and children will one day stand accountable before God.

    Marriage isn’t the preserver of the human race. Plenty of other species have survived without marriage. Cockroaches for example…hehe. Maybe without marriage we’ll ending up destroying each other. But man was around long before marriage and survived.

    “are not allowed to break & get out of their commitments & covenants & go be with anyone else than their one spouse, unless it’s for Christ’s rare exception of ‘fornication’ committed before the marriage was made but kept hidden.”

    The Bible doesn’t contain all the true teachings or all of Christ’s teachings on marriage. There are more reasons than that for breaking the commitment and covenant. When one spouse does any of several horrible things, that terminates the covenant. Committing the unpardonable sin? What if one spouse goes haywire and kills one of the children? Makes a covenant with Satan?

  3. AV says:

    I agree, all leaders who support any abuse & suffering going on in marriage or in a divorce situation, ‘will’ one day stand accountable for it, if they did not do all they could to help stop it.

    But stopping abuse in marriage does not mean divorce, it just means helping the abuser to repent & if they won’t, then leaders are to provide a safe place for the innocent spouse & children to be so they won’t suffer abuse anymore. The innocent spouse may still be able to love & serve their abusive spouse from a ‘safe distance’. And thus preserve the marriage & keep the family eternal, until they can be safely back together again as a family, after the abusive spouse repents, either in this life or the next.

    For everyone has to eventually repent in the next life if they don’t here, before they can go to one of the 3 kingdoms.

    It was a Prophet that said that ‘marriage is the preserver of the human race’ & I agree with him. For if marriages disintegrate, so do the individuals involved & the family, church & society.

    I am not aware of any record of man living without such a thing as ‘marriage’.

    Many people & even some leaders have their opinions of what might also justify a divorce, but no one can change Christ’s laws or teach contrary to them & expect to be trusted.

    Christ gave one specific justification only, even though he fully realized that in most marriages on earth there would be some form or degree of ‘abuse or adultery’, etc. But he knew the chaos & destruction it would quickly bring, if most all couples divorced & kept swapping spouses as soon as their spouse did something abusive or adulterous, as most do.

    Christ when teaching about divorce clearly explained that even abusive adultery & abandonment does not end the marriage or break the covenant, & that they are still husband & wife & can’t go marry someone else. Christ knew that someone who divorces their spouse has lost their love for that spouse (or they wouldn’t be divorcing) & thus that person would also probably be abusive in many ways & yet he still said they are ‘still married’ & thus it’s committing adultery to be with anyone else. So clearly even ‘abuse’ & serious sin does not break the covenant. According to Christ, marriage is impossible to get out of, unless for the one exception of ‘fornication’ that he gave.

    If spouses commit the unpardonable sin, then maybe that would end the marriage in the next life, but no one one’s who has done that or not & clearly God is the one who will decide who’s marriage will end. But as for us he has commanded us & leaders to not divide (divorce) spouses, for only God will make that determination, for he was the one who made the marriage & he will be the one to unmake it too if need be.

  4. zo-ma-rah says:

    Interesting comments. I have to disagree that the point of marriage is to “[bind] men down.” I think your wording here makes it seem like men are wild animals that need to be caged so that they don’t run around raping every female they see. But I do agree about the “life long commitment & covenant to love, serve & provide.”

    I find myself more in line with AV in terms of what to do about divorce. I believe LDSAnarchy shares a similar view that separation rather than divorce is be a better solution.

    However having said that i think it is only addressing the symptoms. The real root of the problem is people marrying the wrong people. It seems that most of society get married simply because it is what they are supposed to do. Rather than understanding the true intent of marriage many people, especially Latter-day Saints, just get married because it is what they are supposed to do.

    Additionally I think our Western courtship rituals help in creating the problem. We encourage people to date lots of people to find out what they want. So in the end we wind up with people having many semi committed semi intimate relationships. These relationships can be ended for any trivial reason.

    And then we are surprised then that this same mentality continues in marriage. People divorce for any number of trivial reasons just like they did when they were dating.

    Additionally we are surprised at the high incidents of sex before marriage, yet we encourage people to enter into these semi-intimate relationships.

    I’d be really interested in discussing ideas on how a courtship could work that doesn’t allow for these passing intimate encounters. Is there a type of courtship that will allow two people to come to know each other and decide if they are compatible mates, yet doesn’t involve “dating around”?

  5. Rob says:

    So a few questions for you guys and it might very well be that my understanding of covenants is incorrect.

    Do both the parties have to come in agreement to have a divorce or end a marriage? I’m not talking civilly, this is eternal and what God recognizes.

    For example, can one spouse end the marriage? If so, then does that allow the other spouse who was committed to be released from the covenant and not have the “innocent” spouse to not be under condemnation or responsible for the divorce?

  6. Rob says:

    Zomarah- haven’t you watched the Bachelor on TV? There’s your solution. Its perfect. Jk.

  7. AV says:

    Rob,
    Most everyone would probably tell you yes, but I firmly believe no, Heavenly Father does not ask us to give our all to our spouse & for our spouse & suffer because of our spouse, unless he can guarantee us our spouse forever, as long as we are valiant.

    It is impossible for one spouse to get out of the covenant & leave the other hanging, after having given all that love & service for nothing & just have to go find someone else. As long as one spouse stays righteous the other will one day repent & want to be with them too.

    If a spouse falls out of love with their spouse & says they don’t want to be married to them anymore, it proves that that spouse has not kept their covenant to serve the wishes of the other, for we love whom we serve & even fall deeply in love with our spouse if we just serve them, no matter what our spouse is like, good or bad, loving or hurtful. The more we serve them the more we fall madly in love with them. And it can happen fast, it’s a wonderful & even miraculous principle.

    So if one spouse wants out of the marriage, HF knows that he/she is not living righteous & has lost the Spirit, & hasn’t kept their covenants to love & serve the other. So, as soon as they repent, which we all must one day do, in this life or the next, then HF knows that spouse will come to their senses again & want to be with their spouse forever once again.

    So once both spouses are finally righteous, it’s impossible for either spouse to not want to be together. Unfortunately, if at least one spouse did not stay righteous on earth, so they could save the other, they may both have to be single for eternity for neither one kept their covenants. Two unrighteous spouses is what destroys any marriage or eternal family.

  8. Rob says:

    Hmmm…interesting. AV, that makes sense to me like you say that one person doesn’t have their blessings taken away because of another. .

    The only issue I have with that is not everyone will repent. Those in the Telestial will pay for their own sins. They don’t have to repent. Then I looked where it says that in D&C and it doesn’t say it exactly. People attribute D&C 76:104-106 to conveying that. But where does it say all will repent?

    All I can find is what Brigham Young said…
    How many kingdoms there are has not been told to us; they are innumerable. The disciples of Jesus were to dwell with him. Where will the rest go? Into kingdoms prepared for them, where they will live and endure. Jesus will bring forth, by his own redemption, every son and daughter of Adam, except the sons of perdition, who will be cast into hell. Others will suffer the wrath of God–will suffer all the Lord can demand at their hands, or justice can require of them; and when they have suffered the wrath of God till the utmost farthing is paid, they will be brought out of prison. Is this dangerous doctrine to preach? Some consider it dangerous; but it is true that every person who does not sin away the day of grace, and become an angel to the Devil, will be brought forth to inherit a kingdom of glory. [JD 8:154]

  9. Rob says:

    Zomarah, I really like the idea of the book’s format being like a church manual. That is great. Thinking about it, why is there no manual on the topic? There should be something that presents it all. The only thing I can find close is Marriage and Family Relations Instructor’s Manual. But that is about strengthening relationships.

  10. AV says:

    Rob,
    I have read many quotes by Prophets that teach that everyone (except maybe those who go to outer darkness) must become completely cleansed & purified from all unrighteousness & evil desires & habits, & pay for their sins in Spirit Prison & accept the Gospel of Christ, before they can be released & go to one of the 3 Kingdoms.

    The Prophets also say that everyone will eventually exit Spirit Prison, some sooner than others, depending on how long it takes them to work through their issues & sins & accept the Gospel & fully repent.

    Everyone, no matter what kingdom they are assigned to, will have righteous desires & will desire to have the blessings of the Cel. Kingdom & be with their family members & friends there, but must live with the eternal regret & pain in a lower kingdom if they didn’t live worthy of it on earth.

    I will try to find some of those quotes for you, for you’re right, what I have said does depend on whether everyone must repent or not & become righteous & pure.

  11. “God instituted marriage…to protect women…by binding men down to a life long commitment…”

    Moses 3:24 “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.”

    God never intended for men to be bound down, but to be bound to. That is, bound to their wives in one flesh. You make marriage sound so drab, and if an discussion I had with the boys at LDSanarchy is any indication, I think I know why. More later…

    “God did this because he knew it is the disposition of most men to a some point desire to be with another woman…”

    There’s a lot to say here. If you don’t mind me going on a bit of a tangent, I tried to post this on the Exponent blog, but I think I’ve been banned from posting there: I find it sad and amusing when wives send their husbands into therapy because of their so-called “porn addiction,” as if can rightly be called an addiction or a defect in their psyche or physiology. Men evolved that way they did for a reason; it was desirable for the survival of the species. Porn just tricks the body into thinking it’s having the ultimate orgy, but there’s no such thing as porn addiction, nor can it be called a defect or perversion of the male mind or body.

    If you can knock another women up and dupe another guy into into raising your kid, give yourself a pat on the back.<–That's the idea, anyway. But, Zomarah, I believe I see a flaw in your thinking. Men like marriage. In fact, they LOOOVE it. Men don't play the divorce card when they are caught cheating, women do. In other words, men are more about cheating, i.e., having their cake and eating it, too, and women are more about divorcing…there was no such thing as having AND eating cake until birth control came around. Am I making any sense here? Marriage is a null factor here. It's Christ that lifts men and women from their carnal natures and into faithful, committed, MONOGAMOUS marriages.

    "God instituted governments & churches to make sure that men (or women) are not allowed to break & get out of their commitments."

    Man instituted his own governments and Churches, and we have been straining under their bondage ever sense. I don't need any institution to tell me to be faithful to my wife. All I require is the pure love of Christ. I'm faithful to her because I love her, institutions be god-damned to hell.

    "civil & religious ‘leaders’ have not done their most important divine responsibility in keeping men & women bound to their marriage commitments"

    Good. It was never their responsibility anyway. Take abortion, for example. Most of us know it's wrong. Pro-life or not, however, most of us–if led by the Holy Spirit, that is–should realize that if decisions need to be made on behalf of a fetus, they should be made by the mother and not some fat, self-serving, corrupt politician in Washington. Same goes with my marriage. If I want to end that contract, it's up to my wife and I and no other human or institution. You're not espousing the Kingdom of God here, but good ol' fashioned authoritian gov't. The Kingdom of God is law without enforcement. Read that again why don't you?

    "leaders who allow & go along with divorce will one day stand accountable before God"

    No they won't. Why should you or anyone except the people within that contract decide when it begins or ends. I'm not so sure God has anything to do with it, either. After all, "Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother…" God should be out of the picture by then. He can say, "look, these are the consequences of breaking the contract," but the fact that my wife and I have a joint contract with God does not mean we cannot end the contract at any time we choose too. It means we have forfeited our right to Exaltation; I get that, but nobody–not even God–has the right to keep me in an unhappy/unhealthy marriage.

    So much more could be said here. You become so committed to a dead book and its dead words that you lose your ability to make moral, spiritually guided choices. You want to learn the mysterious of God, but you can't move beyond the training wheels–the Triple being the right training wheel, and the Bible being the left. Mormonism's the best of the lot because at one time it was liquid, dynamic, allowed to evolve, to put old things away forever–into the toybox of Judeo-christianity's ignorance and barbarity. You're never going to learn a damn thing unless you get for yourselves the gift of prophecy.

    I'll tell you the same thing I told the guys at LDSanarchy (who seem to be very nice, so this isn't personal, nor is it personal with you). The institution of marriage does not exist solely for the betterment of society. Whenever I hear people advocating for polygamy, they are usually suggesting the ways that it serves the greater economic and social good. My answer to that is short and concise: Nobody wants it. When you push it on them, everyone's unhappy. You can only argue for it's utility when you stop arguing for the individual good, but that's not Zion; that's Communism–left-authoritarianism, aka, NOT FREE.

  12. AV wrote:

    Everyone, no matter what kingdom they are assigned to, will have righteous desires & will desire to have the blessings of the Cel. Kingdom & be with their family members & friends there, but must live with the eternal regret & pain in a lower kingdom if they didn’t live worthy of it on earth.

    No, everyone who receives the reward they receive will desire only what they get and not any other reward. They will not live with eternal regret and pain, but will live out their lives in everlasting bliss. See the blog post Damnation for more info on this.

    Rob wrote:

    Those in the Telestial will pay for their own sins. They don’t have to repent.

    No saved people pay for their own sins. Only Christ “pays” for sins. Those in hell pay “the penalty for their transgressions” (D&C 138:59) only in the sense that they suffer the anguish of the damned, not in the sense that their suffering actually redeems them. All who sin and do not repent are dragged down to hell, where the devil subjects them to his power of captivation, which causes them to suffer exceedingly. But this suffering does nothing to free them from his power. Without Christ suffering for our sins, those souls would remain bound to the devil forever. The only way they can be released from the devil’s subjection is through faith in Christ, repentance of all their sins, vicarious baptism and other ordinances, vicariously performed in their behalf. Only “the dead who repent will be redeemed” (D&C 138:58) and these will be those who receive a reward in one of the three degrees of glory. The filthy still are the only ones who refuse to repent. They will receive a resurrection, but will still be subject to the devil’s power of captivation. All others will be free, but again, not through their suffering, but through their faith in Christ and His suffering for their sins. In other words, it is impossible for us to sin and then suffer for that sin and for our suffering to be accounted sufficient to bring us back into God’s presence. Only Christ’s blood can atone for sins. We can do nothing to atone for our own sins and remain in the kingdom. This is because the penalty of all sin is the second death, therefore, in order for us to atone for our sins, we must be removed from the kingdom of God and return to outer darkness. So, only the sons of perdition atone for their own sins.

    Zomarah, what do you mean by “semi-intimate relationships”? Do you mean exclusive boyfriend-girlfriend relationships?

  13. AV says:

    Noah,

    Most women aren’t about divorcing, they are about having self-respect for themselves & expecting respect, true love & faithfulness from men. Divorce is just a way women have tried to protect themselves if need be.

    Just because a righteous faithful man is very rare, does not mean it’s not possible. Even if women had to stay single, it’s better than marrying a man who won’t be exclusively & completely faithful to her throughout his life, in his mind, heart & deed.

    If men & leaders & laws won’t protect married women from abuse, adultery & abandonment, etc, it becomes ‘unsafe’ for women to marry at all & take the risks, especially considering the rampant abuse & adultery & abandonment today & always.

    God wanted women (& men too) to be completely protected by unbreakable commitments & protective ‘laws & leaders’, before he would ever want or ask women to marry & make herself so vulnerable. Unfortunately those protective laws are not in place anymore & thus it is up to women to have the self-respect to refuse to marry until men, leaders & laws once again are willing to protect them from such things & bind their husbands down to their vows & faithfulness & commitment & not let them abandon her & their responsibilities.

    “The Kingdom of God is law without enforcement” ?????

    God & love, 1st & foremost ‘protects’, & you can’t protect one person, without restraining & applying consequences on to another who wants to hurt that other person.

    You may be the perfect husband, but there is & always has been a problem out there with men & women not keeping their marriage vows & wanting to abusively abandon their spouse & children. And In most marriages on earth there is some form or degree of abuse or adultery going on.

    Who in your opinion is supposed to protect an innocent spouse & children from all that?

    For not even ‘divorce’ will protect the innocent spouse & children, for the abuse & adultery of the unrighteous spouse usually just gets worse after divorce & continues for life, just in different ways.

    So divorce is not a solution but part of the problem.

    God expects & commands ‘all leaders’, civil & religious, in fact, ‘all men’ on earth even, to protect women & children from other men’s abuse (usually their own husbands & fathers abuse)

    Men have always been required by God to protect women & children from the abuse, adultery or abandonment of their husbands & fathers. But few men & leaders have been willing to do this. But Moroni is one good example of a righteous man who was willing to do this & required others to.

  14. Rob says:

    LDS Anarchst- Really good point. That distinction has huge consequences regarding how one views the atonement. I meant to say “suffer”, but I did write “pay.” I guess in my head there wasn’t an important enough distinction to get me to notice what I wrote, even though there should have been. Thanks for saying something about.

    Noah brings up some important points about who is actually involved in the marriage covenants.
    “Man instituted his own governments and Churches, and we have been straining under their bondage ever sense. I don’t need any institution to tell me to be faithful to my wife. All I require is the pure love of Christ. I’m faithful to her because I love her, institutions be god-damned to hell.”
    People should get married and stay married for the desires to do so. Sometimes as humans we go off track and God’s teachings, commandments and guidance will help us get back on track. Governments and churches are man’s creations and have been the worst thing to happen to marriage. Look at the history of why the US gov’t was involved in marriages….horrible.

  15. AV says:

    LDS Anarchist,

    I believe differently. I believe no one who loses their spouse & children for eternity will live in eternal bliss. They will always have the deep remorse & pain of knowing what they lost & what could have been. They may have a measure of peace, but the pain & remorse will be eternal, for not keeping their marriage covenants in order to have their spouse & family forever.

    After we die, the only thing that will matter to us is if we get to be with our original spouse forever or not. Even if we hated & abandoned them here on earth. For we will then remember the vast ‘million year love story’ we had with them in the pre-existence, which we hoped to make eternal by being righteous on earth.

    If we wake up & missed that chance we will never get over it.

  16. AV says:

    Rob,

    I agree that if people will truly love their spouse then they don’t need anyone else to govern them.

    But hardly anyone on earth has been able to love their spouse as they should & as they vowed to, so what then?

    How & who is going to protect all the innocent spouses & children from the many forms of abuse, adultery or abandonment? If not a church or righteous government?

  17. Rob says:

    AV-
    Your concerns, to me, are shared by many other people. It might not seem like a solution you would expect, but take a look at LDS Anarchy’s blog and check out some of the recent posts on polygamy. It is very unique in its take on the principle. The families and tribes they talk about are those that would do so much to eliminate the problems that you mention.

    “Who in your opinion is supposed to protect an innocent spouse & children from all that?”
    In a tribal multispouse family, the family will protect the spouse and children. I personally wouldn’t have understand or much less believed the principle if I hadn’t read about the way it could be from LDSA’s blog.

  18. AV says:

    I have read his posts of multispouse families & I don’t believe in it. I believe it is more of the same problems that we are trying to solve & protect men, women & children from. Just because someone likes something & thinks it’s right & works for them, doesn’t mean it is right.

    I do not believe in any other marriage arrangement than monogamy. I believe monogamy is the test of Exaltation, even if few there be that can do it righteously & with unconditional true love.

  19. zo-ma-rah says:

    AV do you believe that if a person’s spouse dies the living spouse may remarry(serial monogamy) or must remain single for the rest of their lives(true monogamy)?

  20. AV says:

    I believe that if a spouse has Christlike ‘true love’ for their spouse, as they are commanded to have, they will be completely faithful & true & not ever remarry after their spouse dies, & just wait it out on earth just like their spouse is patiently waiting for them in heaven.

    But I don’t believe it is a sin to remarry after the death of a spouse. I believe it is a terrestrial level law, not a sin but not ‘true love’ either. I believe it takes living the Celestial law of ‘True Love’ to be worthy of eternal marriage to your 1st spouse in the Cel. Kingdom.

    I do not believe the 2nd marriage would be eternal, for I don’t believe there will be any polygamy at all in heaven. And it’s impossible to have true love for a 2nd spouse, if you didn’t have it for the 1st. For if you had it for the 1st, you wouldn’t be with the 2nd.

    But, even a spouse who didn’t have true love & thus remarried, may still be saved by the 1st spouse who did have true love & live forever with the 1st spouse, for true love is the one & only power that saves marriages & makes them eternal, even if only 1 spouse has it, & usually only 1 spouse does.

    For it is rare for both spouses to have true love for each other. God seems to often put a strong spouse with a weak one, so hopefully the strong one will save the weak one. Otherwise he will lose the weak one forever.

  21. AV, do you need to read my reply again? because you are WAAYYY off the map in how you have understood me. I’m dead serious. I’ll reply tomorrow just in case you want to take another shot in the meantime.

  22. Wow, AV, what you just said about marriage is right on. Wow. Thanks. You articulated my feelings exactly, even though I had never thought a lot about much of what you said, I immediately knew you were right when you said it. You can rationalize it all you want, as LDSAnarchy has attempted to do; he’s an intelligent guy. There are two kinds of learned: the truth-seekers and the truth-deniers. The former loves his enemies and the latter hates them. One builds up a repertoire of knowledge to nourish the divine spark; the other to snuff it out. I don’t know LDSAnarchy well enough to say which one he is. However, as God as my witness there is no polygamy in the Kingdom of God; the spirit testifies to me, and I think you’ve made a good case. I know some of you still think otherwise. Either you will learn now, or you will learn then, but it is better that you learn now.

  23. zo-ma-rah says:

    Well, I will say I have a much greater respect for AV’s views know that AV believes in true monogamy and denying Plural marriage. Rather than a serial monogamist trying to claim Plural marriage is not true. And it’s given me some interesting ideas for a future post.

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